this poem was going to be about me
because i can never write a poem
explaining myself
but i cant stop from thinking about you
and it just popped into my head
and lately ive thought about you too much
(i think too fucking much)
and you think its every waking moment
and overtime
and way too much too, dont you?
lately ive felt like if you liked poetry
id have a chance
and youd know how i finally felt
but you dont
and you dont

you have a sweet face
i can still see it so clearly over me
just before my eyes close at night
i know that someday ill stop thinking
and i wont loop sad depressing songs
and i wont cry when your voice sounds
hollow
not because youll be gone
but because i will be

for now
im an empty girl
giving to you makes me happy
loving you made me feel whole
but you dont care about that
you tell me to shutup and to go away
not exact words
but your actions scream at me until i
scream
for them to stop

i wish you could understand
i wish i knew what to say
i wish you knew how hard i try
to be there
to make you happy
how much i love you
how much i need you
everyone wants to be needed
everyone wants to be loved
and you deserve it all
all of it

i have it in my heart that
if you only knew
how i truly feel
you wouldnt break my heart
like you do
and that would make all the
difference

or would it?

maybe you know
maybe you still dont care
but youd never say that
youd never tell me the truth
youd never be honest to my face
youd never let me hear your voice
say all these things i fear
you say "whatever."
when theyre said out loud
in questions
everything about me you hate
its alot now

im sorry for being me
for being someone who
doesnt understand
who doesnt take the hint
if youre hinting
who doesnt leave you alone
if thats what you really want
who doesnt listen
when you dont talk
who bugs you
if im no longer entertaining

but im not apologizing
for loving you
ive done nothing wrong

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