dear dad,
ive never written a poem for you
you dont even know i write
you dont know a lot of things
like the nightmares that come at night
you dont know that i like to sing
and that i can perfectly gift wrap
or that i like to daydream sometimes
or that im good at reading a map
you dont know that i hate peas
and mustard is even worse
you dont know what i wish to be
or what i always carry in my purse
what kind of books do i read
what size of shoes are on my feet
if i could pick one person from the past
who is it i would pick to meet
and what exact color are my eyes
and what scar do i have on my left toe
ee cummings is my favorite poet
and theres so much you dont know
im 22 years old
and a stranger in your eyes
the only thing you know about me
is how to hurt me and make me cry
i was once your little girl, dad
i was everything under the sun
i was what made you proud, dad
i was your daughter, number one
over the years i have less impressed you
always coming up in second place
i dont have a fancy job or degree
i dont have a beautiful face
i dont have any accomplishments
im not married nor with kids
i dont have a lot of money
and alot of my life doesnt fit
i feel like ive never been enough
for anyone, let alone for you
im at wits end trying to make it up
keeping the real me from shining through
inside i am still scared of you
of letting you down and you being ashamed
i hear the way your voice sounds
when you speak my name
and when you and i dont talk
you still invade my dreams
you may not think its so
but i wake up holding back screams
you just wouldnt understand though
because theres so much you dont know
but then again its not all your fault
theres so much im scared to show
i want you in my life dad
but theres something to be made clear
i dont live my life for you anymore
and i refuse to live it in fear
i have a mind of my own
and a heart to lead me along
and if you would just realize that
realize that i am strong
understand that life doesnt revolve
around you and what you think is best
that i make decisions for myself
even if i fail all your tests
because im the only one
that lives with what i choose
im the only one dad
not anyone else and not even you
so whatever you wanted in me
im sorry i didnt quite make it
but no longer will i be afraid
and no longer will i fake it
take me as i have become
please take me as i have to be
im sorry if its not enough
but dad... i am simply me.
ive never written a poem for you
you dont even know i write
you dont know a lot of things
like the nightmares that come at night
you dont know that i like to sing
and that i can perfectly gift wrap
or that i like to daydream sometimes
or that im good at reading a map
you dont know that i hate peas
and mustard is even worse
you dont know what i wish to be
or what i always carry in my purse
what kind of books do i read
what size of shoes are on my feet
if i could pick one person from the past
who is it i would pick to meet
and what exact color are my eyes
and what scar do i have on my left toe
ee cummings is my favorite poet
and theres so much you dont know
im 22 years old
and a stranger in your eyes
the only thing you know about me
is how to hurt me and make me cry
i was once your little girl, dad
i was everything under the sun
i was what made you proud, dad
i was your daughter, number one
over the years i have less impressed you
always coming up in second place
i dont have a fancy job or degree
i dont have a beautiful face
i dont have any accomplishments
im not married nor with kids
i dont have a lot of money
and alot of my life doesnt fit
i feel like ive never been enough
for anyone, let alone for you
im at wits end trying to make it up
keeping the real me from shining through
inside i am still scared of you
of letting you down and you being ashamed
i hear the way your voice sounds
when you speak my name
and when you and i dont talk
you still invade my dreams
you may not think its so
but i wake up holding back screams
you just wouldnt understand though
because theres so much you dont know
but then again its not all your fault
theres so much im scared to show
i want you in my life dad
but theres something to be made clear
i dont live my life for you anymore
and i refuse to live it in fear
i have a mind of my own
and a heart to lead me along
and if you would just realize that
realize that i am strong
understand that life doesnt revolve
around you and what you think is best
that i make decisions for myself
even if i fail all your tests
because im the only one
that lives with what i choose
im the only one dad
not anyone else and not even you
so whatever you wanted in me
im sorry i didnt quite make it
but no longer will i be afraid
and no longer will i fake it
take me as i have become
please take me as i have to be
im sorry if its not enough
but dad... i am simply me.